A workplace psychopathic bully is my only direct experience with psychopaths - I can say for sure - was finding myself dealing 100% with the full-blown specimens (I am not one of these hysterical psychotics seeing 'psychopaths' everywhere). As one's ability to actually survive is in jeopardy, it is also one of the most traumatic and difficult situations to deal with.
The overwhelming number of people who contact me with sincere psychopathic abuse stories are women who are, or have been bullied by psychopathic females in groups, or in the workplace. I do occasionally also get men contacting me with the same trauma. So, typical of the entire psychopathic spectrum, the male and female psychopaths continue to cause mayhem and misery in the workplace resulting in countless millions in lost productivity and loss of good employees. How many are driven to suicide in this silent holocaust we'll never know for sure. Forget about going to human resources, as from my own experience, the biggest psychopaths of all in the workplace are HR managers and consultants as they are effectively 'spies' for the psychopaths in upper management.
From the plush downtown office boardrooms to the factory floor and into the clubs and churches; I covered the workplace bullying psychopath in depth with my books Puzzling People and Defeated Demons. HERE >>>
"Is it just me, or is it somewhat ironic that many of the people on these 'Narcissist' Recovery forums met their ex on millionairematch.com and elitesingles.com?"
- Thomas Sheridan
A genuine psychopath can be best thought of as the shadow that is cast by an invisible demon, if one wants to go down the allegorical route. Even so, before you call someone a 'psychopath' it's always a really good idea to check that you are not just dealing with a regular asshole. Then, following this, try to determine if it is you that might be the asshole. In all seriousness, these are importantant distinctions.
If you have been damaged by an encounter with a psychopath - either through bullying at work, or in a vicious relationship - you'll be far too traumatised/numb/confused to be seeking revenge. You need non-hysterical information, and I would suggest staying away from most recovery forums, as they are moderated by some very toxic people who will delay your recovery by locking you into a vicious, vapid trap of seeking revenge and eternal hatred. If you do go on a forum to seek support, make sure the ALL moderators and ALL owners of the site are ALL using their real names. The witchhunt and mass hysteria nature of some of these forums is also a clear giveaway that you are not in healthy hands at all when you pour out your personal story on them. Men going though a divorce/child custody will generally be considered a 'psychopath-by default' by the mainly feminst and homosexual moderators. So be warned.
On one forum I looked at there was a post by this clearly shallow female who told her 'abuse' story of having encountered her 'spath' (oh dear...) through an on-line dating site. When she saw him at the bar and how he was dressed, she became 'suspicious' as he did not look like a successful businessman. In disgust, she went on to then tell all how she walked out of the restaurant and immediately went onto a 'recovery' forum to describe this person as a 'psychopath' and a 'narcissistic sociopath'(?!?!?!).
As expected, the nameless moderators of this forum - all self-professed 'experts' naturally - ran to her support and congratulated her for getting away from her 'abuser'! All this based on a brief look at a guy sitting at a restaurant bar. Even more disgusting, is that one of the moderators declared that all these 'psychos' should be on a public list and his name right at the top.
This is why I tell people to get off these 'recovery' groups. The hidden moderators are generally extreme co-dependents, serial false accusers or incredibly superficial upper middle-class/silver spooned hysterical 'queens' with no real life experience, but think they can evaluate all humanity into tidy little boxes of 'empaths' and 'psychopaths' and yet most of them never had a day of hardship in their lives, nor have ever known the world beyond their infantile comfort zone. Being all 'hurty' that someone dumped your white ass does not mean that person is a pathological abuser of some sort or another. While turbo-charging the schmaltz does not validate some drama queen's alleged 'abuse' either.
LET ME EXPLAIN SOMETHING: WHEN ONE IS A GENUINE VICTIM OF PSYCHOPATHIC GASLIGHTING YOU ARE IN NO STATE TO BECOME A CHAMPION OF EVERY JILTED JOHN AND JENNY UNABLE TO FACE THEMSELVES HONESTLY. THIS IS THE LITMUS TEST - YOU ARE FAR TOO FUCKED UP BY THE EXPERIENCE TO FEEL SORRY FOR ONESELF. POST TRAUMATIC STRESS IS NOT A GAME OF 'He Said...She Said...".
More importantly: most people who are victims of psychopaths experience the horror as a result of workplace bullying, criminal fraud, elderly and care abuse, police corruption, professional and career sabotage and family mindgames. Yet these 'recovery' foums are uniquely 'ex-husband and boyfriends' bitch sessions and little else.
Such fourms are incredibly dangerous places for genuine targets of psychopathic gaslighting abuse to stumble into. However, if you have been a target of gaslighting and mind games - which were purposefully designed to destroy your mind, body and soul - then you need to take care of your well-being and emotional health first by relying on the ones you love and who can support you.
I have written two books on the topic concerning the entire 'spectrum' of psychopathy dealing with the effects, tools to deal with, and how to avoid this very real issue. I do not expect you to buy them, but if you can afford them, I can promise they are very practical and down-to-earth reads.
Puzzling People: the Labyrinth of the Psychopath
If you are broke - as most victims of this rotten experience find themselves - there is a link to dozens of free videos you can watch. I present this information and it's up to you to consider it, in a mature and honest manner. Good luck and best wishes towards your own recovery story.
MORE HERE >>>
Creating a new 'Normal' to protect and safeguard the leaders of society MORE >>>
"I wish no one else ever had to experience it (especially him waking instantly in attack mode, lunging to hit me or jump up screaming and throwing things) I have to admit once I'd heard of others witnessing the same it made me feel less like I was 'crazy' or 'overreacting'." MORE>>>
This is a meme that was made for me by a friend concerning the Reptilian Complex (R-Complex) which leads to the excitable giddiness and arrogance when a psychopath pulls off "a win".
If you are a nice person you are more of a target—they will often remark how kind and nice you are. This makes you easy prey. You will also find that the early sweet loving kindness performance of the psychopath will be interrupted now and again with a nasty and mean performance.
Then a cycle develops where the frequencies of the nasty state increases—while the kindness state become less and less. Eventually, from the height of loving, idealisation and adoration the psychopath obsessively showered you with in the early days—you will find yourself trapped in a negative lifestyle.
DIFFERENCES BETWEEN FEMALE/HOMOSEXUAL PSYCHOPATHS AND 'HETEROSEXUAL' MALE PSYCHOPATH SMEAR CAMPAIGNS
In the case of the female and homosexual psychopaths 'it' will spread hysterical, negative and false rumours about you to their social circle, friends, social networking sites and internet forums while garnishing sympathy from their clueless on-tap, plethora of pity enablers who believe every negative statement about you which the histrionic predator tells them.
Grey areas, restraint and common decency simply do not exist and often it's a dead giveaway. The psychopath simply can't put the brakes on once the R-Complex takes full control. If this is done on-line, then the homosexual or female psychopath will recruit mobbing 'help' from others to join their vicious, high-drama charade in order to back up the initial lies told about the target.
Psychopaths pile lie upon lie to make the previous lie 'the truth'. It creates confusion and shock in neutral observers. Female psychopaths consider kindness in hetrosexual males to be a personality disorder.
Male (outwardly heterosexual*) psychopaths tend to just forget their previous target ever existed and then completely reinvent themselves. Very often, not a single friend from their previous persona will be retained. Very similar to how a reptile sheds its skin for a new one. The similarities are incredible between psychopaths and reptiles.
NOTE: Heterosexuality is provisional in all male psychopaths
BI-SEXUALITY AND HOMOSEXUALITY IS NOT PROOF SOMEONE IS A PSYCHOPATH
- IMPORTANT NOTICE -
You must be adult/mature and show common decency before declaring someone to be a psychopathic individual.
There are a few internet forums and other websites which are run and moderated by hysterical and histrionic individuals which are little more than ex-Spouses and Lovers clubs declaring their ex's to be 'psychopaths' so they do not have to face their own issues in life, or in a few cases, deal with their own glaringly obvious personality disorders which the self-proclaimed 'victim' themselves may in fact possess: Erotomaina, Histrionic Personality Disorder and old fashion infantile petty jealousies and sexual frustrations/hang-ups.
A psychopath is someone who is very much more than an individual who is having sex with another person who isn't you. Please bear this in mind. Life is complicated and can't be put into child-like “my ex is a psychopath because he dumped me!” rationalisations. Most times you are dealing with a creep or just an emotionally immature person. Other times it may even be your own co-dependency which is the issue, and you and you alone needs to work on this. Sometimes they left you for a good reason. You were not the person they wanted nor desired anymore. As hard as this is to face, good people do this to their partners and spouses all the time. This does not make these people 'psychopaths' nor 'sociopaths' and by declaring them so, you will never find any inner peace or resolution.
Being self-reflective of your own life is just about the most healthy and self-empowering thing one can do. Fobbing this off on another human being who has long forgotten you and moved on with their life by calling them a 'psychopath', sociopath', narc', so you do not have to look yourself in the mirror, will only end in your own psychic implosion and social isolation. Along with a wasted and unproductive life of self-absorption within your own “me, me, me!!!” victim complex narcissism.
Having said this, there are also many very real and sincere targets of the most horrific and traumatic psychopathic mind control and abuse. Be they in relationships, subjected to bullying at work, crazy business partners, flying saucer clubs/fringe churches, and even among their own family members. There is only one site people should look to for help and that is Robert Hare's Aftermath. It's the only resource that can be trusted, and operated by the top professionals in the field. What more do you need? Stay away from groups which are constantly looking for donations, or loaded with high drama and schmaltz rides into self-pity, rather than mature discussion.
If you experienced the following behaviour while in a relationship, or working with this person—then you probably knew a psychopath:
Invented Personas to Manipulate Others
Psychopaths are a different version of themselves for every person they interact with. They also have ‘group personas’ for family, organisational and workplace interaction.
Highly Unreliable/Broken Promises
Psychopaths will make the most incredibly ambitious plans including you as their right hand man or woman—then, on a whim, discard those plans and move on to some other crusade that excludes you. Targets often alter their own life plans to help the psychopath reach their imaginary goals, resulting in appalling emotional, psychological and financial chaos for the victims when the psychopath moves on.
Idealisation Followed by Cold Rejection
At the height of their idealisation of you, the psychopath will show you obsessive ‘love,’ care and attention. However, once they feel they have you where they want you—or the relationship has ended—if you collapsed in front of them on the street they would simply step over you as if they’d never met you and continue on their way. Outrageous and very personal smear campaigns against the discarded targets to falsely portray them as psychologically unstable, self-serving liars or abusers are often undertaken by psychopaths following the ending of a relationship.
Becomes Obsessed with a Hobby, Cause, or Individual and then Loses Interest Instantly
However, as soon as the relationship is established, the downward trajectory from idealisation of their targets and towards the inevitable devaluation and discarding begins in earnest. It may take weeks. It may take months. It often takes years. Nevertheless the psychopath always begins the devaluing of their victims as soon as the relationship is legitimised and is always on the lookout for an ‘upgrade’.
Buys into either secular and non-secular belief systems to appear superior or enlightened. Will align themselves with ‘morally popular’ causes to make themselves appear enlightened and with a sense of deep moral wisdom and compassion. But it is always a pose; the psychopath’s association with these causes is a veneer to fool others into trusting them. It’s always fake; always an agenda.
There is Nothing Real Behind the Persona
Behind the months or years of perfectly-constructed performance by your psychopath is a nothing: a void, a blank, a hunger for something the psychopathic entity can never define. They now see no further benefit in playing this part and have moved on to a new role. It is just business. You are treated to a completely new, cold and emotionless persona. “Who is this stranger?” you will ask yourself over and over again. It is so bewildering.
The Sudden Goodbye
Then the psychopath finds an upgrade, changes their persona, will often change their look, fashions and even change the subject when they suspect others are figuring them out and you begin asking questions. "Hey, never mind that, it is lovely weather we are having!" Stated in a chipper and almost giddy manner (with an obvious underlying glibness). They are repressing the internal excitement at having pulled a fast one on you.
RED FLAGS AND TRAITS TO LOOK OUT FOR
Before we move on to learn how to identify an individual who may be a psychopath, I want to stress this clearly, emphatically and unequivocally—that one should not declare a person to be 'a psychopath' unless you are completely sure you have fairly and honestly evaluated that individual with as much emotional neutrality as possible. To use the label 'psychopath' is essentially to state that this individual is not a human being. Such a statement—no matter how much someone may have wronged you—must not be taken lightly.
The pathological drive of any psychopath over the course of his or her life can be anything and everything selfish, appalling, immoral and evil one can think of. However, there are Five Absolute Traits which all psychopaths (both male and female) have, and this is what you should be on the lookout for if you think you are in a relationship with a psychopath or if you have questions about an individual whom you may have come into contact with in the past who may have been a psychopath.
THE FIVE ABSOLUTE PSYCHOPATHIC TRAITS
(lacks conscience—shows no genuine guilt for their actions)
Invoking Pity in Others to Manipulate and Control
(sob stories of past sexual/other abuse—claims nearly all their ex's are insane/alcoholics)
Mysterious Pasts/Vague Personal Histories
(life story never seems to make sense—contradictory pasts—missing periods in their lives)
(an actor who'll play the role 'you' require from them—until they change the performance/role as they learn a new script)
High Levels of the Hormone Testosterone
(impulsive—sexually intense—upper body strength—poor
RELATIVE SECONDARY PSYCHOPATHIC TRAITS
There is also a cluster of potential Secondary or Relative Traits which are often present in psychopaths. Understanding and applying these will go a long way to help you distinguish between psychopaths and everyday, run-of-the-mill obnoxious creeps and charlatans. With Secondary Relative Psychopathic Traits, not every psychopath will have all of them. Some will have most, or nearly all of them—most psychopaths can demonstrate these traits at different stages over the course of their lives.
Sexual Promiscuity/Asexuality/One Night Stands
(appears to have learned all they know about sex from watching pornography)
Staggering Levels of Double Standards and Hypocrisy/Projection
(projects their own faults onto others—accuses the target of doing to the psychopath what the psychopath is doing to them) NEVER SAYS 'SORRY'.
Narcissism/Boastfulness and a Sense of Being Born for a Special Purpose
(expects to be praised constantly and will praise themselves if they do not get it from others)
History of Brief or Failed Relationships Ending Badly
(gets engaged/married on impulse—always blames the other person for the relationship failing—if relationship is long-term, this means they have the perfect enabler)
Fight or Flight Response
(poor stress tolerance—can't debate—insults and lashes out)
(sneers, poses or smirks or 'looks away' when being photographed)
Eyes Sometimes Dead and Lifeless
(coupled with a hypnotic stare—eyes can also dart around from left to right when scheming) Very often a disturbing intense predatory stare when challenged or refused a request.
Needing, at Most, 4—5 Hours of Sleep at Night
(sleeping aids, prescriptions and alcohol used to extend their sleeping periods or to avoid boredom)
Faking Cancer or Other Serious Illness
(shaving their heads, eyebrows and body hair to fool people—will set up charities and fund-raising events—harvesting pity—looking for heroic recognition)
Does not Dream, or Fabricates Unrealistic Dream Stories
(reduced complex cognitive processes in and around the frontal areas of the brain)
Constantly Looking and Acting Busy for no Apparent Reason
(moving around, traveling here and there for no apparent reason—busy, busy, busy)
Leaves their Target Abandoned and Alone for Hours on End
(will bring target to a party in a room full of strangers and then leave them on their own)
Highly Unreliable/Broken Promises
(makes highly ambitious plans, then changes them—makes promises and never follows through)
Constantly Trying to Correct Others’ Opinions
(font of all knowledge—arrogant 'know it all'—always has to have the last word, usually an insult. VERY passive aggressive.)
Crocodile Tears and Unconvincing Emotional Responses, Superficial Laughter
('Gentle Soul' personal with ham acting—pretending to wipe/dry their eyes—rooted in frustration, not sorrow)
Extreme and Obvious Flattery, Emulating and Sycophantic Behaviour
(when targeting/scheming: whatever they think you want to hear and see, they will say and do it)
(releases large amounts of dopamine and norepinephrine, while reducing serotonin within the target's brain)
(overly complex speech and writing in order to look clever—often makes no sense—contradictory from one sentence to the next)
Claims to be the Only Person who Really Relates to Target
(in order to begin socially isolating them from their support network of family/friends)
Sets the Agenda—Never Meets Anyone Halfway
(announces, never discusses—gives orders, never asks—dictates, both overtly and subtly)
Obsessed with the Latest Pharmaceuticals/ Hypochondriac
(can include healthy eating obsessions which never last)
Has no Real Creative Talent
(can only copy—can’t innovate or be original)
(when in a long-term relationship, working with or living with, will drain the life energy out of you—long-term partners age faster and develop serious health issues.)
Claims to be Independent/Maverick
(but in reality is completely dependent on enablers to supply him/her with basic living needs)
(excellent at reading people and social situations in order to exploit them—finding and using emotional 'triggers')
Easily Takes Offence
(will often harbour a grudge for years and then produce it out of the blue in order to confuse the target, often as a deflective tactic during an argument)
Gifts Designed to ‘Buy You’ or to Mould You in a Certain Way
(their own personal taste in clothes—will use gifts to 'improve' you)
Can't Handle Criticism
(becomes highly defensive when confronted with their own behaviour—they are perfect)
(cured with con-artistry, promiscuity, alcoholism and/or drug abuse to alleviate the boredom)
Does Not 'Get' Clever Satire/Complex Humour
Laughs when they see other laugh. Child-like sense of humour at best.
(lies instinctually, even when telling the truth would be the better option—can't accept blame—will say 'sorry' that the target is hurt, but not actually be sorry for hurting them)
Feels They are Entitled to the Best of Everything and Expects to be Indulged
(only says 'thank you' to make a good impression on potential targets—soon afterwards stops and complains they are not being indulged or waited upon quick enough)
Exploits Friends, Parents, the Elderly or Handicapped
(money, free rent, altering of wills)
Claims to have a Special Relationship with God (Spiritual Narcissism) or Extreme Atheist
(both are just belief packages the psychopath will use to impress others)
Claims to be a Spy, Assassin, Special Forces Personnel or other Clandestine Agent
(will collect military and other similar memorabilia—fake medals and combat awards)
Twists Conversations and Meanings of Things to Suit Agenda
(diverts conversation to gain moral or intellectual higher ground—when stumped, changes the subject or gets angry)
Uses Dysfluencies More than Most (i.e., 'umms', 'ahhs', etc)
(does not listen to what others say after the Idealisaton stage because the psychopath does not care)
For a More Complete Understanding of the Issue from the Viewpoint of Dealing with, and Recovering from a Psychopathic Abuse Situation, along with a Basic Introductory Understanding of the Impact of Psychopathology on Individuals and Society; Please See My Books: Puzzling People and Defeated Demons.
No matter what, you will never get a genuine psychopath to say 'sorry' directly to the person they damaged, ever. They will go to absolutely extraordinary lengths to not give an apology. They are hard-wired not to do it. They literally can't issue an apology. You might get. "sorry you are upset" or "sorry you are feeling this way." - these are not apologies. These diversions are putting the problem back onto you.
The reason for this is the psychopath's persona-switching. The present version of the psychopath is not accountable for the current persona. It's not capable of saying sorry, as the old version of the psychopath is the one is (technically, at the very most) responsible and not the one presently inside the psychopath whom you are looking for an apology, remorse, understanding, culpability from. Will never, ever happen. Never. You are asking for a shark to go vegetarian and expecting it. Don't waste your energy trying - move on with you life and be glad they are out of it forever.
Which is why Governments, Organised Religions and Banks function without remorse or common decency. It's never their fault. It's always the fault of the ones they target and the targets are always the ones who are made to pay for the evils of the psychopaths and the psychopathic institutions.
A genuine target won't post photos of their ex's erect phallus on their 'recovery and support' Facebook group. The will not expand witch hunts to include outing innocent by-standers on various message boards by revealing their real names to the world for not partaking in their own virtual, dysfunctional 'last chance saloon' passed off as a support group.
Only the unhinged—or perhaps psychopaths pretending to be victims—partake in such psychotic and dangerous episodes? A certain kind of toxic individual who uniquely starts and continues very personalised smear campaign, while also claiming they are somehow 'victims'—the psychopath, proto-psychopath and the psychotic are the only ones who do this—no one else sinks to that level. MORE>>>
He will have signs around his home with slogans such as EVERYONE DESERVES A HAPPY CHILDHOOD and other trappings of Hallmark-style superficial chemical-bonding inducing tactics. She will be told how he needs taking care of and she'll gladly do it. He will be a child when he needs to be—so adorable and "what a gentle man in this day and age of horny brutes".
With a Teddy Bear in Hand, Trembling Bottom Lip and Finely-Tuned Passive Aggressive Neediness, Once in Control, the 'House-Devil-Street-Angel' Tyrant and Manipulator Arrives Centre Stage, and You'll Be Left Wondering Where 'Mr Gentle Soul' Went. MORE>>>
When I was a child, my favourite board game was Snakes and Ladders. I played no other board game—none of the others interested me. I must have played Snakes and Ladders every day of my childhood. When I had no one to play with me, I would play as the two players all by myself and roll the dice twice until one of my buttons reached the magical one hundred score at the top of the board.
Then I would begin to play the game all over again. MORE...
Il predatore-psicopatico e la sua guerra contro
Sintesi del lavoro del ricercatore indipendente Thomas Sheridan
Dedicato ai magnifici Esseri Umani del reparto di chirurgia del Fate Bene Fratelli Isola Tiberina di Roma. Alle Care amiche della stanza ed ai loro parenti, agli infermieri ed alle allieve infermiere, ai medici, agli operatori del vitto, agli operatori delle pulizie, ai rappresentanti della fede cattolica, ai volontari ed a tutti gli altri Esseri Umani dell'ospedale.
An interview with Thomas Sheridan during a speaking tour of Norway in January 2013 in which he talks about his work in exploring the issue of psychopathology at the social and cultural level. Thomas also talks about his new book Anvil of the Psyche.
The Nothern Star newspaper in Lismore, Australia carried the following story in their July 19, 1879 edition concerning a 'Psychopathic Physician'. Which appears to be the term used by the good doctor for his 'hands on healing'.
"Stand back from the patient and give them room! Is there a psychopath in the house!"
Segment of a talk given in Stavenger, Norway in September 2012 on the need to recover from a damaging relationship as soon as possible and not to dwell eternally on the experience. MORE...
This is the first resource you visit when looking for information on psychopaths: HERE Once you have absorbed Robert Hare's work, then begin to look at other aspects and information on the subject.
But only do this with objectivity and emotional neutrality. Just because the predatory capitalism currently running the planet appears psychopathic in nature - does not mean everyone behind this system are psychopaths. Some are, most are just playing the game.
AT LEAST 96-99% OF THE HUMAN RACE ARE POTENTIALLY YOUR FUTURE FRIENDS YOU HAVEN'T GOT TO KNOW YET.
Stay Positive - Look for the Good in Everyone - In Most People You Will Find it .